Monday, 5 October 2009

The Monday Poem

This week The Lord High Eejit has set us a photo poem challenge (you can see the challenge here).  We were to choose one or more photos supplied by his good self and create..... 

I chose this photo.

And here is what I did with it.

Novice Jogger

The dark-light, dark-light, dark
Of this fence's strobing shadow
Stripes my pounding feet
As they beat this aching street.
Five miles or fifty, it's all the same.

The slap, pant, slap, pant, slap
Of my forty-something progress
Echoes wall-to-wall
An acoustic rubber ball.
Five miles or fifty, it's all the same.

The tick, tock, tick, tock, tick
Of molasses-mired stopwatch
Slices seconds like a knife
I am running for my life
Five miles or fifty, it's all the same.
I can manage neither.

Then there was the whole Tommy Tucker debacle.  I thought that was what we were going to have to do, so I made this....

Little Tommy Tucker

Little Tommy Tucker
Went and took up with a hooker
But the hooker was no looker
So he callously forsook her.

Seeking consolation
She then sued for compensation
But it went to arbitration
She was filled with indignation.
And such terrible frustration.

She felt dissatisfaction
At the judge's poor reaction
And she wowed to take some action,
Put an end to her distraction.

Rigged his pressure cooker
To blow up the feckless sucker.
And now little Tommy Tucker
Rues the day he crossed that hooker.

(Or he would do, if he had lived)


  1. ahhh.. really liked the fence poem... jogs along nicely and clever (as always!).. then there's little tommy tucker!.. I almost chortled my ample hole orf! :-D
    marvellous stuff from the keyboard of a word mistress.. I need to get a dictionary!

  2. Molasses-mired stopwatch? I have one of those. I seem to wear it when I'm cycling on my stationary bicycle.

    I loved the Tommy Tucker poem, especially the last two lines of the first verse.

  3. An excellent job all round. That shadowy fencing was a good choice and you complemented the photo beautifully.

  4. Again... How I wish I had talent like you. I identify completely with the last line of Novice Jogger.

  5. Ooh, really enjoyed both of these, and great to read one about the fence poem (no one else chose it). The patterns of the stanzas match the photo so well, and I loved "molasses-mired stopwatch". And the final line, of course.

    The Tommy Tucker is very funny, particularly liked the first verse - the hooker was no looker!

  6. In fact, I seem to more or less just agree with Kat. Sorry for lack of originality in my comment!

  7. Feel a bit out of breath just reading Novice Jogger!

    As for Tommy Tucker, I liked your choice of the less obvious "sucker". :)

  8. Great jogging poem and it really works well with the photo which isn't easy, especially for that photo.I loved the opening strobe effect and could feel the tiredness myself particularly in the' slap, pant ,slap, pant, slap' Five miles or fifty? That's impressive, I couldn't run 50 yards at this stage!Thanks.

    Tommy Tucker was funny and you have an iron will resisting the obvious alliteration and going for feckless sucker instead of.....?

  9. I loved this picture so much. I have a real thing for pictures where there is some kind of visual rhythm, whether it be lots of the same object (my header is a close-up I took of a bowl on cinnamon tic-tacs) or like this one with the stripes of the shadow. Shame no-one else went for this one I would have like to see what they did with it.

    @Watercats - your comments made me laugh my own ample hole off (such a pleasant image). I was worried that the repetition thing on the first line of each verse was a bit contrived, but what the hell!

    @Poetikat - I know that feeling all too well. I'm way out of shape and will be a novice jogger again any day now, honest, I've got my trainers and everything, when the weather clears up, when I'm off the on-call rota, really soon.

    @PhilipH - Thanks you for your gracious words as always.

    @Human - You DO have talent! One of these days, just go for it and let your imagination run and run.

    @Titus - Thanks, I did enjoy doing these this week. As a fattie, I'm no stranger to that stoopid stopwatch.

    @Dominic - I can't tell you how much I was tempted to go with the other word - I think in some ways it would have been better: the F is a more forceful sound than the S is at that point in the line, but I bottled it and went for the less offensive opion, wuss that I am! BTW, I heard you singing one of Rachel's poems - you have a real talent there, my friend. Have you written any other songs?

    @TFE - Thanks, I thought it was a great photo and for "iron will" read "wuss"!

  10. Wow, this jogging poem made me feel sluggish. I need to get out there and run...

  11. Ah nuts! Titus took my 'ooh' comment. Oh well, I'll just say these were a delight, reminiscent of my gazing at the dotted highway lines, that strobed effect. And that ol' T. Tucker, sure gets around. ; )

  12. I tried jogging and failed miserably because every time i was tired to the point of collapse (IE after five steps) there would always be a gang of kids ready to shout abuse - so i would feel obliged to carry on.

    I mention this because that's what your poem brought to mind - trying to jog and not feeling able to.

    Loved the Tommy Tucker story and i notice that Harold has his own space now?? Will catch up with his story shortly

  13. Yes! Glad someone else chose the fence. Like your poem, and to experience a different take on it. Thanks for your visit and comment.

  14. Two great poems, and so different. You're very skilled! The Tommy Tucker poem made me laugh out loud! ;-D

  15. @Mad Aunt Bernard - Thanks for the kind words. LOVE your moniker!

  16. Great!
    I'm going to put you in my personal blog list, you are fun!


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